Day 20 – What do you REALLY want?


Practicing search and rescue scenarios.

I’m going to be real with you.  It may look like I know what I want, but in all honesty, I’ve never really had a concrete, solid, 100% money back guarantee of what it is that I truly, and wholeheartedly want.  I’ve been pretty wishy washy with my wants and desires for the longest time.  I know that this has bothered some people in my life who are close to me, and I apologize for that.  I no longer want to be that person.  It’s hard to trust someone and to have complete faith in their capabilities when they are constantly changing their mind.  Well, things are about to change.  Thank goodness for that!  

Learning to Suture!

I can’t pinpoint when my ‘a-ha’ moment actually happened, but somewhere over this past week – away from the city’s hustle and bustle – things settled.  How is anyone supposed to know what I want, and how can I expect to have what I want, when I don’t even know what I want.  When I haven’t been brutally and genuinely honest with myself – completely and totally transparent.

Maybe I’m more aware lately, who knows.  But I’ve been noticing signs encouraging me to CHOOSE. Commit to something already!  Like a few words standing out for me as I flip through the Oprah magazine – WHAT DO YOU WANT?  Or this quote that popped up on my desktop the other day, making me laugh out loud realizing that something is obviously trying to get my attention:

“One of the principal reasons why so many fail to get what they want is because they do not definitely know what they want, or because they change their wants almost every day.  Know what you want and CONTINUE to want it.  You will get it if you combine desire with FAITH.  The power of desire when combined with faith becomes INVINCIBLE” – Christian D. Larson

How come sewing pillows makes me nauseous, but I can't get enough of suturing skin?!!

So what did I do?  I sat down, pen in hand, and wrote at the top of the page, “What I want!”.  You should see the list.  It’s pretty cool, I’m not going to lie.  I then went on to create a picture, in writing, of how I want this life to look like.  What steps I have to take NOW to get there.  It’s as though I’m putting out an order to the universe, saying, “I’m ready now, FINALLY!”.  I’m excited to watch this manifest.  I can feel that things are different, just from doing this simple exercise.  Just with this simple realization:

“The reality is that what you want, wants you.  Your goals, desires and needs are patiently waiting to gravitate toward you, once you decide what you truly want – Jack Canfield

This is your equipment, ready? GO!

So choose a path.  Commit to it.  Or if you’re scared, watch as I transition and experiment with this.  I have a really really good feeling that life is about to get a million times more amazing.  Take charge of your life right now.  It all starts with KNOWING what you want.

This is gonna be good.

Smile with your heart!

You should have seen my face during this lecture!

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5 comments

  1. Hi Jen
    I think you are fantastic and I must be good to finally see the beginning of what you want. I had a teacher a few years ago, he said that it’s different between a person that are passionate interested in there jobs and those you are not. If you are passionate you do a better job because then you put in all your heart.
    Because of how you write about your county I have started to long to travel to Vancouver, and think about the city, Yesterday I got an e-mail out of the blue with this advertise:
    http://careers.wmc.ca/JobDescriptionMultiple.asp?WebJobPostingsID=109&chkbox109=chkbox109
    Maybe I have a chance, I will apply for it anyway, this would be my passion.
    Love from Sweden

  2. The glow of your being outshines every star! And when I think about manifest, I next think: I SEE IT, it’s in the word and off we go to it! You’re good to go.

  3. i love this- i relate with what you said about being wishy-washy and bothering other people in your life over not having a clear grasp on your desires/wants. my question is…. how do you figure out what you really want?! anybody have an advice about this? i’ve been struggling with this ever since i graduated from college. i am all over the place and can’t seem to find a direction…

  4. I miss RMAP…cannot wait for Utah!!!

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