Day 1 – I’m back!


I’m back!  Thank you to everyone who took the time to write such beautiful and kind words.  I was blown away – thank you.  And thank you to everyone for being so patient, for supporting me during this well needed time off.  Thank you for continuing to read and trusting that I would come back!  I can’t thank you enough…

So what did I do on my 40 days off you ask?  Well… not much.  Unfortunately I don’t have a ton of fun photos to share or fun experiences to write about (minus this breathtaking trip to Jasper).  I pretty much was an ‘a-loner’.  Huh?  Yes, that’s right.  I spent a whole bunch of time alone.  Not necessarily feeling lonely, just alone.  Hence, an ‘a-loner’.  Happy being alone. I was in a quiet, calm space filling up this lil’ soul of mine, which was well over due.

To be honest, I wasn’t able to look at my blog for most of my time off.  I hid as much as I could.  Nourished this lil’ exhausted soul.  Apparently, it was tired.  Flat.  Lifeless, is what it felt.  This is not me?  I’m not flat?  I’m not dull?  Something must be wrong.  And so I listened…

With a spoonful of humility, I listened.  I became quiet.  I learned.  I recognized.  My body was trying to tell me something.  Let go.  I tried to ignore it, but it wouldn’t go away.  LET GO!  It yelled even louder.  So that’s just what I did.  I simplified.  I let go.  Of probably too many things, but it’s what my heart was asking for.  A dream job at a dream company, a booked trip to Hawaii with a marathon to boot (sorry guys but this marathon has been put on hold!), and more things that would make many people think, ‘this girl is crazy’ – funny, you don’t know this yet??!

I listened to myself and I followed.  I followed my gut.  At points, I would become frustrated. Why?  Why should I give this up?  I don’t understand!, I would scream from inside.  Why?!  Why is this what I want?  Frustrated for having the ability to understand what my body was telling me and frustrated for following through.  Why me?  Why am I able to understand this?  I was scared.  Scared to follow, scared to let go.  Scared of the unknown.  I let go of the comfortable and threw myself into the unfamiliar.  But strangely enough, it felt good.  Like a sneaky content, smirky glimpse of a smile – it knows.  It trusts.  This is right.

So what happens when you give up “the dream” to follow your heart.  Does this then become the dream??  Living to your heart’s fullest?  Not doing what other people would crave for?  Not following the norm?  Drawing your own squiggly lines instead of following everyone elses’ straight and narrows.  Does this then become brave?  To give up the glamour and excitement for humility?  To give kindness to yourself?  I believe so.   I believe this is what builds the foundation for greatness.  Because when we are doing what we love, we are in-spired.  In-spirit.  Glowing.  Contagious.  Spreading joy.

Sometimes life needs to be shaken up.  Woken up a little.  Like that snow globe you dust off from the holiday box and put up on the shelf.  That old thing?  Just sitting there, it blends in.  It’s plain.  There’s not much to it.  It’s just another Christmas ornament like all the others.  However, this ordinary ornament becomes more beautiful, more unique, the more you shake it up.  When you mix up all of those settled pieces before placing it back on the shelf, it stands out.  You want to watch, you want to en-joy it.  You want to take it in.  You better understand its purpose – all because you shook it up.

If life shakes you up a little bit, sit back and enjoy the beauty in it.  Everything seems to happen for a reason.  Who really knows the reason why, and to be honest, who really cares.  Give up the ‘why’, and just be.  If your little soul needs a vacation?  Take it.  Don’t worry about why, just do what it needs.  Don’t worry what anyone else will think either, just do what you love.  Listen to your heart.  And just breathe.  The rest will fall into place.  It always does.

It’s good to be back….

Smile with your heart!

(p.s. my bad for counting wrong – I didn’t realize until last night that it’s been over 40 days since I’ve blogged.  Oops!  I must have counted wrong in my state of exhaustion – I guess I really did need the extra break!  Thanks for understanding – it’s good to be back!)

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Categories: Uncategorized

29 comments

  1. Glad your back! : )

  2. Yeah! :-)
    You should have seen my smile when I saw the e-mail! You took more more than 40 days, and you could have taken 70 or 80 or 100 days, we would have been waiting! I’m happy you’re back, really! I miss you, and the kind words that start my days!

    Welcome back! :-)

  3. Welcome back, I love the words Smile with your heart. Following your intuition takes strength and courage. Love the beautiful photography, thank you for sharing.

    Namaste

  4. So glad to have you back. I was soooo excited when i recieved the email with your new post. Beautiful writing. You truly are gifted:) I am so happy for you that you now feel better and rejuvenated. So many of us don’t listen to our guts enough and it’s inspiring that you did just that! You followed both your heart and gut which is so important. They know best! I am learning, through my certified Enneagram life coach, who happens to be my dad, to listen to my gut more and drop in out of my head. It’s a hard process but i’m learning and changing for the better and becoming calmer and less anxious…ahhhh BLISS. I am also addicted to “ma” practice! You should look it up…so amazing:)

  5. Yay!! I have so missed your perspective. I meant to write you and ask you to come back- well I didn’t get around to it but now you can know that even more people than you heard from were pulling for you and love reading your stuff. For every person who finds time and the right words to say, there are so many more wishing we had- so every supportive comment stands for double and triple itself! :) glad you didn’t cave to haters ;)

  6. You’re back!!!! Put a huge smile on my face :) glad you had a nice break and can’t wait to continue reading about all your new adventures.

  7. Love the snow globe analogy! Sooo true!

  8. Oh yay, yay, yay you’re BACK!!! So happy to read your blog again. You so deserved the time for renewal and for yourself but you were missed so much too.

  9. So glad to see you back!! You have been inspiring me for so long now!! ;)
    Also happy to know and totally understand that the time off was a beneficial one!!! Look forward to ur blogs always!!! :D

  10. Thank you everyone for your support! It’s good to be back :) !!

  11. You are so inspiring! So glad you are well…and back!
    Thank you.

  12. I can just agree with all the others, I hae so much looked forward to today and I haev been waiting for your post. You are so beautiful inside out.

  13. Yay! Your back!!!! So proud that you gave yourself permission for the break and new direction!
    Like Dr. Wayne Dyer said: ” A sense of Purpose is not something that you find; it’s something that you are. Truth is not something that you look for; it’s something that you live”! It sounds like you’re living your truth……welcome back!

  14. Hey Jenn!

    It’s Amy’s dad here. Your heart is seen and shared in your words from the Soul. Young women like you are an inspiration and blessing to the world. Pause and rest well, yet keep following that dream!!!

    I remember hearing the call of the Divine as a child, following it where ever it led. Leaving the mystery of the known behind and embracing the invitation into the unknowable. I’ve been on this path for many years, looking and exploring deeply within for the “One”. Glimpses of awakening, the deepest moments of this incarnation keep reminding me gently that all life springs from within.

    Today I feel like a hollow bamboo flute (Shakuhachi) that I play often; ready to listen to the wind of the beyond where you’ve been, seen, touched and so skillfully share…

    Blessings!

    Jim

  15. I was so happy to see your post!! Just last night I feel as thought I did the same….I let go, I surrendered a pray to my heart, my soul…that said…You lead, I’ll follow. I let go of how I think my life should be or what I want out of it. I promise to listen more. You always seem to be leading the way for me and your the universe replying in kind with confirmation that I am on the right path. Thank you for having the courage always to share your truth! xoxo, Jana

  16. YAY!!! Welcome back! I’m so glad you are back!!! You are definitely my daily inspiration!

  17. Yay! I’m so glad you’re back. Seeing the email saying you had had posted a new entry made me smile. You are so encouraging and so brave. Thank you for sharing…and for returning to inspire us!

  18. Yay!!!! I’m so glad you are back! You are such an inspiration :)

    Follow your heart!
    xoxo

  19. Just what I needed after a long 12 hour shift. Glad you’re back!

  20. So glad you’re back!!!

  21. Yeah! Welcome back! It is a delight to see you back:). I hope the wounds have been healed and you are feeling loved, excited, inspired and beautiful! For so many of us who do not even know you, your beauty shines through this blog …and in every way:). Your energy is magnetic and wonderful! so glad you are back:)

  22. Loved hearing from you again! Great photos. Have you ever read May Sarton’s “A Journal of a Solitude”? http://www.amazon.com/Journal-Solitude-May-Sarton/dp/0393309282
    Good understanding of being alone. Be happy!

  23. Happy to read your blog again!
    I can relate to this post – brought tears to my eyes.

  24. Lovely to have you back – go gently JT, no pressure and just enjoy and listen to your heart. Sometimes we do more by doing less.
    xx

  25. As always, such beautiful pics. So happy that you are back and looking forward to all you have to share….

  26. Yay!!! You’re back :) thanks for the inspiration!! Glad you are feeling rested!

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