I was told by more than one person going into this 40 day yoga challenge that a lot of emotions would come up unexpectedly. I thought to this, HA! You obviously hadn’t seen how much of me was wringed out during my trip to Australia! Well, boy was I wrong. After tonight, I’m aware that there is still so much more in me that needs to heal. I’m learning that this healing is always going to be a part of my continuous journey. It’s so much of who we are and who we allow ourselves to become.
When I was making my vision board a few months ago, I clipped out a picture of Seane Corn who is a well known Vinyasa Flow yoga teacher from L.A. I’m not sure why I clipped it out, as I didn’t know anything about her – I think I really liked her hair – but it just felt good. When I found out she was leading a workshop tonight at Semperviva, I couldn’t help myself from signing up. I’m so glad I did. 2.5 hours of yoga BLISS! The class was amazing. 125 people buzzing with positive energy and high on life. Me included!
I was having a great time with my yoga stoke, until we neared the end of the class and started getting into some very intense hip openers. I’ve learned through practicing yoga that we store the majority of our emotions in our hips – me especially. Mine are tighter than your average person, so I must be holding A LOT of stuff in there! I didn’t realize how much ‘stuff’ to be exact until she started asking some questions during one of the hip openers. I thought I had worked through most of it recently with all the tears and emotional breakthroughs over the past few months, but I was in for a surprise tonight.
She explained how we often store our emotions in our hips, and that it is not unusual for our feelings to release once we allow our cells to release. We hold our tension in forms such as anxiety and fear within our body. If we do not allow this to release, it only builds up more and more stress causing more and more anxiety/fear, you name it. As I was picturing my shrivelled up unhappy cells that were making their way around my body at that moment, she began to quietly ask some questions that might be bringing up some emotions. Are you currently going through a transition? Yep. Are you perhaps experiencing a lot of change in your life lately? Yep. Are you just finishing off school? Yep. And the kicker – Are you out of a relationship, and experiencing being on your own? Yep and yep. Was she talking specifically to me? It sure felt like it. I don’t know why, but at this moment I started to tear up. The kind of tears where your face shrivels up and doesn’t want to let the tears out but it’s inevitable. They just kept coming softly after this. I have no idea why, but they must have needed to come out. It felt good. I imagined my cells releasing this built up tension and fear, and noticed myself relaxing even further. I’m learning that I still have so much to learn. It never ends. I’m always growing, always healing and always expanding.
I’m going to transform my fears and tears into faith. Faith in the unknown. Faith in trusting that my heart will lead me where I want to go. Faith in my gut and most importantly, faith in myself. We always know, it’s the believing and trusting that’s the hard part.
Fear into faith. I like that.
Smile with your heart!